Pinched in their prime --so many lost souls.
Nothing gripes my bottom like a poacher pincher. This father and son outing ended poorly.
- 586 first-degree misdemeanor counts - possession of out-of-seasonn lobster and wrung tails
- 2 third degree felony counts - possession of more than 100 undersized lobsters
- 14 second degree misdemeanor counts - possession of speared lobster out-of-season, stone crab, undersized stone crab and reef fish not landed in whole condition
- unscheduled outing to the Monroe County Detention Center
I can just imagine the phone call to the mother after the arrest. Probably something like:
Son: "Hi Mom."
Mom: "Hi Honey, how's the Dad bonding fishing trip going?"
Son: "Not so good."
Mom: "What's wrong?"
Son: "Well...we're bonding alright. More like bail bonding."
Mom: "What are you talking about? What did you do? Where's your father?"
Son: "He's here. Uhhh, Dad...Mom wants to talk to you."
Muffled male voice that sounds something like,"Ahhhhh. I don't want to talk to her."
Son: "Here's Dad."
Dad: "Hi Sweetie."
Mom: "I don't think you should be sweetying me right now. What is going on? Where are you?"
Dad: "I'll explain everything when I get home, but right now I need you to move some cash out of our 401K to the regular checking account."
Mom: "What? Why?"
Dad: "We need to get out of jail. Apparently it's illegal to spear undersized, out-of-season, lobsters. It's also unfortunate that we decided to pinch their heads off while still on the boat--also against the law. I believe that some of them were berried."
Mom: "Lobsters? Berried? What does that mean?"
Mom: "My God. You beasts. How many lobsters did you kill?"
Dad: "Better sell some of the mutual funds too."