Man arrested in Florida after taking backhoe for joyride

Carl Blahnik would like to thank everyone that attended his backhoe party on the seven mile bridge. It was a rip roaring shindig... $30,000 extravaganza!

A special plug for his fellow Wisconsin residents and also those who made the trip from his current neighborhood, "a wooded area near Coco Plum Beach."

 Sheriff Rick Ramsay attended. He was quoted saying...." Blahnik's skill at making tight turns and working the backhoe's scoop to rip up road reflectors over three miles of the bridge was quite impressive." 

Thank you also to tax payers for providing funding for Carl's..." year in prison and a year on parole after his 2012 arrest for felony battery in Lake County, Ill."

And also for future funding of his charges:

- vehicle theft

-reckless driving

- fleeing from law officers

- aggravated assault

 - littering and damaging U.S. 1.

- driving on a suspended license

- driving an unregistered vehicle and not having proper lights for night driving

- possession of undersized, out of season, pinched, lobsters...... (jk)

http://www.keysnet.com/2016/02/20/507141_dot-backhoe-boy-caused-30000-in.html?rh=1
http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2016/02/16/Man-arrested-in-Florida-after-taking-backhoe-for-joyride/4961455652662/

Here's the video!
https://www.facebook.com/floridakeyssheriff/videos/vb.212276136815/10153251443446816/?type=2&theater

"FBI releases photographs of Key West bank robber"

 Update:

Local Key West authorities have turned to the FBI for help in the apprehension of the bank robber who escaped all possibility of capture..... when he sped away... on his bicycle.  The police cars were no match for this bicycle get-a-way on the 2X4 mile ISLAND.  The criminal must have fled over the ONE bridge off the island. I mean... he is probably almost to Big Pine Key by now (depending on the wind resistance on his BICYCLE).

The FBI is asking the local community for help...like they are too busy or something.






http://www.local10.com/news/fbi-searching-for-key-west-bank-robber

This just IN.. bank robber in Key West! How will he get-a-way?

Gosh--I hope that they can catch him...


For the full story...
https://cbsmiami.files.wordpress.com/2016/01/key-west-bank-robber-1.jpg

"Two Arrested in Fish Case"

Report: Man hid marijuana in buttocks

The report says that the officers found a plastic bag containing marijuana "hidden in the crack of his buttocks."

I think that is was presumptuous on the part of the arresting officer to assume that he was concealing this bag of marijuana. Maybe - that is just where he keeps it... hands free and moist.  He could possibly carry lots of stuff there...car keys, money, or even his cell phone...not hiding... transporting!   

 Don't get me wrong... I'm all for arresting this guy...especially since he was listed as a "violent offender with special conditions."  Although, I am confused about what possible "special conditions"  a violent offender could have?  Does he dance the jig? It is possible with extra butt cargo, he might walk with a spring in his step.  Does he have a facial tic? Probably only when sitting. Can he have heightened sense of taste? Most likely not... especially if he smoked his recently toted marijuana. 

That'll chafe for sure.

http://www.local10.com/news/man-accused-of-hiding-pot-in-crack-of-buttocks-during-traffic-stop/36720416
photo: https://www.flickr.com/photos/bigbookpress/galleries/72157624674133759/

This just in... Hialeah Man Caught with Undersized Snapper

This Islamorada man was caught in possession of:

 - undersized Yellowtail Snapper
- undersized Mangrove Snapper
- undersized Schoolmaster Snapper

This guy went to jail. Unfair.

OK...here's the deal... these are undersized Snappers...like teenager Snappers. 

 You know who is really at fault here? The Snapper's parents.  They were probably like, "we wash our fins of these hooligans, they never listen, always want the easy way out...eating the worm dangling in front of them instead of searching for their own food like we taught them..."

Give a fish a worm... he can eat for a day. 
Teach a fish to catch his own worm... he doesn't end up in the cooler on the boat.






http://keysnews.com/node/71462
photo: http://casualfurday.com/tag/fishing-cartoons/